Monday, October 12, 2015

What's a girl to do?

Sometimes I wonder if I made the right decision. I have had to make so many decisions since I got home from my mission.....Did I make the right one?

I learned so much as a missionary. I discovered how much my decisions really matter and how much I really care about my future. I want to progress in this life. I want to make the right decisions that will lead me to progress. But, am I making the right decisions? I have no idea. I feel like I am and then I talk to people about it and I question everything I am doing. I am not sure if my decisions are leading me in the direction I am intended to go. I am not sure if maybe I should have made a different decision along the way and I have no idea where to go from here. I am at a very weird place in life. I don't have a family of my own, I am not finished with school, and I am currently separated from all of my siblings and parents. What's a girl to do?

I know why I felt like I should move away...so that I could make decisions for myself, but I still find myself questioning every single one. I don't like when other people tell me what to do or how to live my life, but I have the hardest time making decisions for myself. Right now, I am trying to decide where to live, what to study, who to be interested in, who to associate with, and what kind of returned missionary I want to be and I feel like I am failing in all aspects. I don't know if I am doing anything right. It all kind of stresses me out. Way too many decisions to make.

I know what most of you are going to say, I need to have more faith and pray to my Heavenly Father for help and direction. Well, I say, Amen to that.

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